The Unsteady Hands of Time
Day #13 of 30 days of Experiments in White on Black
I notice if I start judging things early on, as I did this doodle, if I make a mark and say: that was wrong, I should have done it differently, I don’t like that, the judgements start to pile on top of one another, and then the next mark is harder to make and pretty soon I’m ready to scrap the whole thing. I have to convince myself to keep going because all the judgements together have convinced me that this thing, still in creation, isn’t worth it. Isn’t worth doing. Isn’t worth finishing.
When I am open to seeing what something is — not just what I am creating but am open to seeing what something or someone is, holding back my judgement and approaching with curiosity, instead of opinions that convince me I already know the value and meaning and worth of what is before me, things and people surprise me. It’s so much better, so much more interesting to be open and to be surprised.
And the key seems to be, to find a way to hold off judgements, especially early in the process or the encounter with something or someone new. I understand why we judge early and often — it keeps us in control in a new situation. But it also keeps us from going anywhere new, or that lovely thing that happens when we discover something new, when we encounter someone we didn’t expect to like and find out, they, like us, have surprising depths, depths worth knowing.
