Eccentric Ensembles or Fashion Sabotage?

Authorities Fear Copycats

The sudden surge of do-it-yourself fashion anarchists staging eccentric ensembles, often in bold, clashing colors, has raised alarms in clothing stores across the country.

“This is not just a few isolated episodes,” said influencer and brand ambassador La Danielle, wearing a crisp white off-the-shoulder linen blouse, pastel pink high-waisted wide-leg trousers, metallic gold strappy sandals, oversized tortoiseshell sunglasses, a layered gold necklace, and a playful woven straw handbag with colorful pom-poms.

“We applaud a little fashion mayhem from a known brand. This is clearly the work of someone who appears to have no known financial motives other than creating confusion. Plus, the so-called ‘Guerilla Stylist’s’ obvious fondness for inexpensive vintage clothing with no particular brand allegiance suggests the work of an amateur. Still, Goodwill officials are worried. Thrift stores have called for backup from the fashion police to head off a new spate of unfortunate fashion mashups.”