Amateur stylist leave trail of clashing fashion mashups
Fashion Police called in to investigate
In a development that has baffled and amused the local community, a rash of clashing fashion mashups has been discovered across several stores, prompting the involvement of the Fashion Police. Officer Enrique Delgado, dressed in a demure black cashmere sweater, stone grey chinos, and polished leather loafers, commented, “We are treating this rash of fashion crimes as connected. It’s clearly the work of a singular individual, several years behind the latest trend. We are still trying to ascertain whether these attempts at style are sincere or ironic.”
In the meantime, the Fashion Police have expanded the hunt to the tri-county area and factory outlet stores. The Pastel Committee has offered a reward, as well as gift certificates to J. Jill, for information leading to the arrest of the ‘Guerilla Stylist.’”